Hey everyone, please come and join me for my birthday stream on Twitch!

Another year spending my birthday in lockdown, not being able to see friends or family and not being able to celebrate the way you normally would has made it neccessary to find other ways to celebrate, for me I thought it would be fun to stream so I have taken the day off work and will be doing my first ever 12 hour stream to celebrate. There will be fun, games, chats, a unicorn onesie and I will be auctioning off some of my artworks that have been completed on stream. The auction will start the day of my stream and will go for three days finishing during my scheduled Saturday stream.

You can check the auction at Birthday Auction when it is live.


These last two years have been rough and have definitely had it’s ups and downs, and lately I have been really struggling, I feel sad all the time and I don’t really know why or what the cause is other than possibly depression and I’m sure I am not the only person who feels that way, it’s hard on everyone. Sometimes it’s hard to admit that you’re struggling but unfortunaltey it is a part of life and everyone has their moments, maybe for me the nearing of my birthday has made the feel more depressed it has gotten worse over the years and being in lockdown and feeling isolated all the time does not help, but having this stream event to look forward to has really helped me to keep going.

On Saturday during my stream I had lots of laughs with CaptainXIT as we played No Man’s Sky and it was the first time I have laughed like that in a long time and it was amazing and now I am really excited about my birthday event and sharing it with friends and having a good laugh. I hope to see you all there and to spend my birthday with you all!!

On the 22nd and 23rd of May I attended my first event in two years and it felt amazing, I have been in a bit of a slump lately just feeling really flat in general and attending this event and seeing my amazing con family, it gave me the boost I so desperately needed. I feel so rejuvinated and reminded of how much love, fun, friendship and memories I have with so many of these amazing people. Given everything that has happened over the last year or so it felt strangely normal to be at this event, occassionally there was the awkwardness of whether that person was up for hugs or not but most of us were hugging and it was like old times and felt so good.

The people I spend time with at these events are family and they always will be, this family has so much importance to me because they have been there for so long. I was never good at making friends, well I was good at making them but was never good at keeping them, so to say that I have known and been friends/family with some of these people for close to 16 years is just incredible. When I think back to my pre-convention attending days I never would have thought I would be where I am today and be apart of such amazing community. I still feel so lucky to be a part of such an amazing community, I share so many memories with these people and they will always hold special places in my heart because without them those memories wouldn’t exist.

First day of the event I wore my Happy Little Vegemite shirt for nostalgia reasons and the next day I just wore another fandom shirt as always, I didn’t really buy anything over the weekend until the later on the Sunday where I found my mate Jase at Gateworld Collectables had a awesome signed cast photo from Agents of SHIELD and that show helped so much over the last 18months that I just had to buy it.


Here is a quick review of the event… When I arrived I had to park at basically the opposite end of the showgrounds to where the buildings were so that was a little bit of a nuisance. There was also a massive queue to get into the show with prebrought tickets, one that I had walked the length of before being told that I need to go back and join it… I only had a day ticket and I was in no hurry to get into the event so decided to just hang around, I couldn’t be bothered walking all the way back to the end of the queue eventually I managed to get it. The hardest part of often working events is that when you just attend them you have to deal with all the queues, I would have actually volunteered for this event but because I didn’t have the okay from my doctor to go back to my actual job full time and in the office following surgery I didn’t want to take any chances.

Once you got past the entrance queue there was another entry queue to get into the main building of the show, due to the restricted numbers because of covid they had to stagger the entry into the building, of course it made perfect sense and had to be done but there was a definite annoyance in the crowd of people. Unfortunately the queue was like that most of the day and if you left the building at all you had to line back up to get back in, this is why I did by best to avoid having to leave the building, I only did so once and at that stage had not realised you had to go through the whole process again, lucky for me I was with friends who had the Supa Q pass and they let me back in with them, “sometimes it’s not what you know it’s who you know. Anyway the queuing was really the ony negative thing about the event and the reason for it was understandable.


I just really enjoyed spending time with my con family it was great catching up with everyone, talking about things that had happened, even having a little cry with friends because yes, sometimes things get too much and I don’t always talk to the people/friends closest to me about the things that effect me and I think the last few years between medical issues and COVID lockdowns I’ve kept a lot to myself and in some ways I let myself open up with these friends/family, which isn’t neccessarily unordinary but maybe it was just that there was more to talk about this time than in the past. I think COVID and the lockdowns really made it feel hard to talk to people, because everyone is going through the same thing but differently so you don’t neccessarily feel like you can talk about your issues when those around you have their own… It was good to talk about it with these friends who I hadn’t seen in ages and learn that yeah, maybe I had been through a little more than most in the last 18months.It took me a while to get this post out because straight after that weekend, like three days later Melbourne went back into lockdown and it feels like it has been two week lockdown, two weeks open since then and it is so hard to do things when there is no consistency anymore.

Complete Guest List: Zack Snyder, Miranda Otto, David Wenham, Radha Mitchell, Liam McIntyre, Elizabeth Blackmore, Nicholas Hamilton, Luke Arnold, Lincoln Lewis, John Jarratt, Spike Spencer, Aimee Smith, Joe Brumm, David McCormack, Nicola Scott, Tom Taylor, Stewart McKenny, Anthony Christou, Queenie Chan, Jamie Johnson, Dean Rankine, Al Barrionuevo, David Yardin, Darren Close, Gary Proudley, Christopher Sequeira, Steve Proposch, Jack Dann, Steve Paulsen, Janeen Webb, Tracie McBride, Charles Spiteri, Maurice Zanthos, Rebecca Fraser, Dr Karl Kruszelnicki, Jay Kistoff, Maria Lewis, Amanda Bridgeman, Jodi McAlister, and Astrid Scholte.

QUICK ANNOUNCEMENT: Have decided not to continue with my vlog for the moment, with getting into streaming I have been thoroughily enjoying it and have decided to keep persuing that for the moment. Might return to the Vlog at a later night or just post Highlights from my stream of important moments.


I have been busy lately with having started streaming on Twitch, but I recently got back into doing some drawing and decided to reimagine one of my old drawings and create a character from it and want to use it in my streams as emotes and other things.

SMIDGET BOT

I started to reimagine this character to use in emotes after becoming Affiliate on Twitch and thought it would be cool to use and it would be fun getting back into drawing something a little different than normal. At the moment I only have one emote of him available and that’s only for Tier 3 subscribers to which I have none, but I’m hoping once I get more subscribers I can get more uploaded for people to use in mine and others chats on Twitch and discord. I was also thinking of creating T-Shirt designs for a Twitch/TeeSpring store to sell.

You can check my Twitch channel out here: https://www.twitch.tv/smileygidget

I honestly don’t even know how to put into words what this year had been like for me and I know so many people have had their own struggles too…. this year will definitely be one that I will never forget and I’m sure a lot of people can say the same thing.

This year and it’s struggles have been such a emotional roller coaster from the isolation of Melbourne restrictions and working from home to the people I have loved who have left us this year, I still cry when I talk about them like my boy Zac who I miss dearly when I just want a fluffy hug but Izzy my girl has been by my side and my rock this year more than I ever though possible. My Nan who left us not so long ago and I miss so dearly that I still cry for often even though I know in my heart she’d be telling me to stop crying and be strong and to which I respond with “I’m trying Nan” every time, but to cry is not a weakness it’s a realisation that you need to let the emotion go, if I didn’t cry this year I would be a horrible pent up mess of so many emotions so I know it is better out than in.I never thought I would be dealing with these medical issues for another year either but here we are and now I know it could go on for much longer or even end up being something I deal with for life, this year and it’s crazy hasn’t made it such a focus point even though the pain is always there and constant it’s been easy to ignore with everything else happening…

There have been so many good things this year though, I found Twitch and with that I found one of the most supportive and loving communities I have been a part of in a long time, this year was my first year in years that I didn’t attend a convention or event of any kind and the twitch community have definitely helped to fill that void and give me the family that I have missed, I have made so many new and amazing friends and achieved goals I never would have thought to have such as starting to stream and becoming affiliate on twitch, making a little bit of money doing something that I thoroughly enjoy never crossed my mind before…

I hope that 2021 will be a better year, but then again for me the last two years have been especially hard even if I don’t think anything will top this year for the emotional struggles… our lives with Covid and this pandemic is not over yet and we just have to be prepared for whatever comes next, we have to remember to be safe and to not take things and people for granted.

You are all special people to me and I hope that as we say goodbye to 2020 we do so with people who are special to us be it in person or virtually, let enjoy life as much as we can right now. Love to you all, HAPPY NEW YEAR!

(Post copied from Facebook, but I really wanted to share it here too)

MERRY CHRISTMAS to every single one of you amazing people!!!!


This year has been a challenge for everyone and as we approach the end of the year we are all hoping that the year ahead will be better to us. Christmas time is suppose to be a joyous time, when people visit and spend time with their loved ones, for some this is the first time this year they have had the chance to spend time together, and for others they might be missing their families because they don’t want to take the chance to see them or they are unable to due to restrictions.

I have mentioned it many times that this year has been a hard one with so many challenges and that we are all going through it together, however we are all having our own unique experiences as we go through it. My family tends to never actually celebrate Christmas on the day, one side tends to celebrate it before and the other afterwards but this year it all happened before the day, I don’t really have an issue with it I just find the actual day a little depressing because other family members have partners and other families to go and see and then here I am on my own with my kitty for company. It’s not terrible, sometimes it’s nice to be on your own it just feels a little sad at this time of year.

Christmas was hard this year and I’m sure I’m not the only one to feel that, it has been a long yet short year with both sooo many things happening but also not a long happening at all, it’s honestly just been such a bizzarre year but one thing it has been is EMOTIONAL. It’s like you get to a point where you think you are okay and then something stupid happens but that one thing seems so much worse and it causes that dam to break and all your emotions to come running out… both Christmas celebrations this year I cried, but when it was with my Dad and some family I tried so hard to be strong and hold it all in I balled my eyes out before getting ready to go in hopes to get it out of the way before getting there but then I arrived and it all came crashing back again. I know I don’t have to be strong and hold it in, but it hurts knowing that your crying is effecting and making others emotional around you, but I also know that sometimes you just need to let it out and I am a lot better with that concept than I used to be. Even if the celebration started with tears I still managed to have a great day with my family and that is what matters.

I hope everyone had a great Christmas day or Christmas celebrations, whether it was alone or spent with family or friends, as long as you were able to enjoy yourself that is all that really matters. I started my actual Christmas day in a stream, as I do scheduled streaming every Thursday night so it just happened to bleed into Christmas Day and it meant I got to do things I love, I got to entertain and make people smile and laugh whilst I had fun playing games, dressed in Christmas clothes and wearing different Christmas hats, some times it’s the little things that make all the different and I’m so glad to have so many amazing friends. I also did a Christmas evening stream which was amazing I had a lot of fun playing games with friends, started with some Phasmophobia, then some Fall Guys and even a quick trip into Ark to see what Christmas presents my mate had left me there.

You can join my Discord and see some clips and highlights from my streams here: https://discord.gg/YvHc8xrw


We did the 12 Days of Christmas at work, thankfully with weekends and a day off I had enough Christmas shirts for almost every day.


QUICK ANNOUNCEMENT: I have decided to stop my Vlog for the moment and focus on Streaming, not sure if I will come back to it or not as I did not really have many viewers on my vlogs.

Hey everyone, I have posted a new Vlog… trying to keep to posting once a month, please check it out!


I have also started on a new adventure of Streaming, and Gaming… which I talk about in the above Vlog. You can find my new Twitch streaming channel and the Discord server I have created in my website menu bar, or at the following links:

I have only streamed twice so far and the first time was not recorded, so far the streams have included me playing games such as Among Us and Phasmophobia with mates and just having a good time. I do have many other ideas for streaming, but if you look at my discord server I also have a section for stream suggestions so please head on over and throw some of your ideas at me, and check out my Twtich stream to see me being my goofy self with other friends and playing games where I either get killed or kill people.

I have been enjoying watching the amazing Gigi Edgley and her daily Twitch streams lately, ever since we had to get Zac put down and a friend suggestion I join in watching one of Gigi’s streams I was hooked. Gigi is amazing, such a lovely person and entertaining to watch on her live streams whether that’s singing with her brother, commentating on Farscape or playing game – the gaming is the most hilarious!

This year has been a really hard and challenging one, not only for me but for eeryone, I have just had a lot of grief to deal with this year that on any normal day would throw me around but this year just feels so much harder, but I am so grateful I was introduced to this amazing community that is Gigi Edgley’s Twitch Tribe. I felt welcomed and at home from the first stream I watched, everyone is so incredibly friendly and there for you if you need a friend or just someone to talk to. I am honoured and proud to be a part of this beautiful community.


Gigi is very grateful to her fans and those within her Twitch Tribe community, once a week each Tuesday for me but Monday for all my American friends, Gigi has a chat with different members of her tribe, asking questions and getting to know them, they can talk about their hobbies and interests and whats happening in their lives, pretty much anything Gigi feels like asking them about.

Last week I was chosen as the Tribe member and got to have a great chat with Gigi, we spoke about things that have been happening lately, my convention experiences including the times I have met Gigi (first time 2009), I shared my convention photos, my artwork and even my photography.


Check out my chat with Gigi below:


Check out Gigi on Twitch and joing the amazing Twitch Tribe.

I realised that it had been a very long time since I last added new photographs to my site, so I went through a collection of photos from the last five years and have added some of my absolute favourites. I hope that you like them, they are of a range of different things including animals, nature, planes and sunsets.

NEWEST ADDITIONS:


You may have also noticed some other changes to the website, mostly page changes to make the site easier to navigate and with information easily accessible. Hope you like the changes and if you have any feedback let me know.

For fun, here is a video that my brother sent me as he was going through some old family footage – This video is of 3 year old me perfectly summing up how we all feel about the current restrictions and it’s kinda adorably hilarious.

Goodbye my beautiful Nan, love you forever and always.

My tribute to my Nan as posted on Facebook 5th October 2020:

It’s hard to put into words what I feel at the moment, my heart feels heavy and I feel a little bit lost, last week my family said goodbye to a beloved member my amazing and beautiful Nan. Such a kind soul who was strong, inspirational, loving, caring and warm with the most beautiful and welcoming smile, every single person who walked through the door of that house was welcomed as family and that always meant so much to me.

She graced this world with her presence for 96 years and I am so lucky to have had her in my life, she was always so special to me and I love that we had such a strong connection, I will cherish my memories of her forever. I miss her so much already, especially that smile, those warm comforting hugs, her text messages and her face as she watched out the window and waved you off every time you left the house after a visit. Thank you for everything Nan, I’ll miss our conversations where I could talk to you about anything and everything. Love you forever Nan.

Rest In Peace Nan
Mona McLeod 11/07/1924 – 01/10/2020